.

J.D.: Shut up, shut up, shut up, and shut up, okay? Who are you people to give me advice about anything? All you do is just bitch about your relationships all day long!

And you know what? Glare all you want, big dog, okay, ‘cause I’m not afraid of you. “Oh, no! Jordan’s only paying attention to the baby!” That must be so hard for Dr. “Look At Me”! Isn’t it? “Look at meeeeeee!”

And you two? Come on, you’re arguing since you got engaged? Wow, you’re probably the first couple that’s ever done that, ever. It can’t be that you’re just scared, is it?

And you! You know what, let’s just - let’s just forget for one second that a month ago you told me you couldn’t be in a relationship with anyone. Because, for me, it’s actually fun to watch you sabotage your relationship from the outside. It really is.

Honestly? The only thing that gives me comfort, you guys, is while I’m sitting at home, staring at the ceiling, just wishing that I had someone to talk to, is knowing that none of you idiots realize how lucky you are!